Archive for the 'Misterpants' Category

Kindergarten

first day

Be A Dear And Get Mummy Another Martini

It is time for our biannual trip to Southern California next month and for the first time we’re bringing Misterpants with us. Himself’s Grandmum turns 90 on September 11th and with her failing health, rising age, and living in another state we decided to make an appearance in Malibu and surprise her. This means a two and a half hour flight with a five year old in tow and ruining the day of the five other people seated in first class on out flight. I apologize now folks but you should all be glad he has grown out of the colic. Just sayin’.

This also means missed days of school since the kidlet starts kinder at the start of September. He is beyond looking forward to it, every day around here starts with, “So, Mum. When will the school bus pick me up?” The answer to that is Unholy:30 kiddo. Make sure you’re dressed and your underpants are on, k.

I’m not in disbelief that he is starting school, but still rather in disbelief that someone is still allowing me to raise a child to begin with. I’ve seen more than one person lament about how they are going to be lost or without something to centre their day around. I secretly want to rack my head against the wall when I see this. I am positive it has something to do with refusing to lose my identity the day I lost the placenta. Get a hobby, get a job, get an education. Shit, get a puppy. But stop your whining, you’re making those of us who click our heels and squeal as the bus pulls away look bad.

That Warm & Slimy Feeling

This morning I was woken up by a chilly Misterpants and a demanding grey asshole. After both were done clambering into bed the kid turned around, gave me a kiss, and said “I love you Mom.” My heart swelled, for my child is not liberal with oral declarations of love and affection. And while I reveled in the moment, he sneezed and proceeded to wipe snot all over my sheets.

It just goes to prove that a five year old can ruin any moment, not just the ones between two consenting adults.

Thanks Mum

I spent six hours cleaning Misterpants’ bedroom yesterday. To say that it was an unholy pit is a bit of an understatement. His floor was a covering of books, old clothes, and paper instead of the wool carpet I know is in there. Even the fish tank got a cleaning, good because the fish that was in it got flushed so long ago I don’t want to admit when it happened. Even now I still have a box of assorted toys and crap that need to find their rightful homes. As I sit here writing I can hear him in there tearing through the trundle of wood train parts and I want to cry.

In the middle of it all I had a sudden appreciation for my Mum, the woman who would wait till we were at school and then tear our rooms apart. I’d arrive home and everything would be in its proper place. Then I’d spend the next week bitching about the invasion of privacy and how I couldn’t find anything (yes, even at six years old). But now I know why she did it. Thanks Mum, for all the hard work. I may not of understood your need to do it when but I do now.

Five

five

All Cowboy Boots Point Toward Puyallup

Ahh, The Puyallup Fair. A yearly trip filled with expensive food, cheap trinkets, and scone lines a mile long. It is possibly the only place you will find someone in shit kickers and a gang-banger in the same booth. And every year I return with a Cowchip Cookie and a case of gastric distress the next day.

Last year I passed on entering anything simply because I had nothing to show. Such was not the case this year and I managed to get three items done and entered on time. So a few weeks ago off I went with Lizard Ridge, my Manos Clapotis, and my felted silk and cashmere shawl. I didn’t have high hopes because the fair draws from such a large area but I was pleasantly surprised when made the trip over on Friday.

red clap

lizard ridge fair

sc wrap fair


Some how I managed to pull off an Honourable Mention, Second Place, and Third Place. The Second Place ribbon comes with a premium of $5.00, or not enough to pay for parking let alone a skein of the yarn that went into the piece. Overall I am very pleased with how I did and I can’t wait to see the judges comments.

High Voltage

Several weeks back Misterpant’s Grandfather took the time to show and explain to him how to work a record player. Some times I have a hard time grasping the fact that he will never know a life with high speed internet, high-def television, or (for now, at least) war. He has point-blank asked where the monitor was for a typewriter. So the fact that can knowingly work a record player, and balance a penny on the head of it if needed, makes me giggle. The fact he was using one to listen to AC/DC is just par for the course.

You see, there are only two reactions I get when telling somone that my son listens to AC/DC. The first is pure shock, the kind that reads, WhatKindOfParentAreYou! The other is amusement; in either that I am allowed to parent a child to begin with or that he even knows who AC/DC is. I’ve often had to remind people that he was the child that would fall asleep to the soft sounds of Led Zepplin’s Immigrant Song as a newborn.

In many ways I have had to suspend my own disbelief at his musical tasted. Much of what he likes is older than his parents. The local classic rock station is a favourite. He has no idea who Raffi is but will frequently request to listen to the Rent Soundtrack. He knows the words to most Willie Nelson songs. And now he can just as easily flip an album as he can zip through an iTunes music library in search of something to listen to.

iKid

Considering he is walking around, using my iPod Nano like it is an iPhone, it may be a good idea to make something similar to this for Misterpants.

Yabba Dabba…Dude, Is This Leg Done Yet?

Knitting has commenced on the current round of Sockapalooza socks. When I read my pal’s colour preferences I knew this skein of Socks That Rock would be perfect. Fred Flinstone is full of golds, oranges, and reds, all of which are colours she requested. I figured I would let the patterning speak for itself and did a simple toe-up with an afterthought heel.

fred flinstone

In my effort to raise and culture my child I now have him wandering around the house singing the tunes from “RENT”. There is nothing funnier than seeing your four year old standing in the living room, belting out “Today 4 U”.

And Today We Are Four

misterpants